Date: Mon, 8 Jul 2002 03:08:06 GMT
From: Butcher City
Subject: BLAGUES-L: Bacon Tree


Date: Wed, 19 Jun 2002 11:40:39 -0400 
From: Gilles Champoux 


Back in the cowboy days, a westbound wagon train was lost and low 
on food.  No other humans had been seen for days.  And then they 
saw an old Jew sitting beneath a tree. 

The leader rushed to him and said, "We're lost and running out of 
food.  Is there someplace ahead where we can get food? 

"Vell," the old Jew said, "I vouldn't go up dat hill und down other 
side.  Somevun told me you'll run into a big bacon tree." 

"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader. 

"Yah, ah bacon tree. Trust me. For nuttin vud I lie." 

The leader goes back and tells his people that if nothing else, they 
might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge.  
"So why did he say not to go there?" some pioneers asked.  "Oh, you 
know those Jews -- they don't eat bacon." 

So the wagon train goes up the hill and down the other side.  Suddenly,
indians attack and massacre everyone except the leader, who manages 
to escape back to the old Jew, who's enjoying a "glassel tea." 

The near-dead man starts shouting. "You fool! You sent us to our 
deaths!  We followed your instructions, but there was no bacon tree.
Just hundreds of indians, who killed everyone." 

The old Jew holds up his hand and says "Oy, vait a minute."  He then 
gets out an English-Yiddish dictionary, and begins thumbing through 
it.  "Gevalt, I made myself ah big mistake. It vuz not a bacon tree,
it vuz a ham bush!"