Date: Tue, 27 Jun 1995 16:55:42 -0400 (EDT) Subject: BLAGUES-L: What not to call your dog From: Herby WHAT NOT TO CALL YOUR DOG Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Boy. I call mine SEX. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the city hall to renew his license I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said he would like to have one too. Then I said, you don't understand, I've had Sex since I was nine years old. He said I must've been quite a kid. When I got married and went on honeymoon I took the dog with me. At the hotel I told the clerk I wanted a room for my wife and me, and a special room for Sex. He said that every room they had was good for sex. I said, you don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night. The clerk said, me too. One day I entered Sex in a contest. Before the competition began the stupid mutt ran away. Another contestant asked me why I just stood there, looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should've sold my own tickets. But you don't understand, I said, I had hoped to have Sex on TV. He called me a show-off. When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, your Honour, I had Sex before I was married to her. The judge said, me too. Then I told him that after we married Sex left me. He said, me too. Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came up to me and asked me what I was doing in this alley at 4 'o clock in the morning. I said I'm looking for Sex. My case comes up on Friday. ... Blind people don't bungee jump. It scares the dog.